Rockin Eve
So it's New Year's Eve (just barely). I suppose the appropriate thing to do is engage in the ritual of reflection and contemplation. Good times, life lessons, the plethora of New Year's resolutions that any naughty girl like myself is bound to need... that's sounds like a rip'em good time! Too bad I haven't any egg nog... we could coze up by the fire, crack some walnuts, and rehash 2004. Mmmm.............................
BUT NO! I refuse to celebrate the 52nd anniversary of
's life as an android (hey, we all know he's been dead since '52) in such a manner.
I thought about lodging some complaints against the army of confetti-throwing jacklegs that are primed to invade the world's streets and pubs this Eve. You lightweight tourists, I mock you... well, sort of. I don't begrudge anyone having a good time, whether it's for one day of the year or the 365th. New Year's always has a crazy feel to it. Its debaucherous energy seeps through the walls.. it raps at the windows.. revelrous perversions burst forth at the slightest provocation. And I'm the type of person that thrives in this raucous environment, feeding off the chaos and disorder, the madness, the passion....
But not on New Year's.
There is something unnerving about scores of individuals full of untapped, drunken energy too dubious to be messed with prowling the streets until sunrise. Though my feelings aren't any different toward people who behave this way 4 days out of 7 - myself and my friends included - December 31st simply scares the hell out of me, as wide-eyed revelers travel down intoxication's golden road. I'll keep my distance, thanks.
But for you crawlers heading out to get buttered up, here are 5 less-obvious tips:
1. That "liquor before beer" talk is bull if you add carbonation
2. Drinks at body temp makes you drunk faster. Make sure that shot of Jaeger is cold :)
3. Take a Flintstone or a Centrum... a hit of vitamins is always good for business
4. Getting on your cell and drunk-dialing people is NOT cool... especially when you're calling me!
5. Bring a towel along... you never know when you'll have to hitch a ride
Cheers all. Take care of yourselves out there and Happy New Year.
BUT NO! I refuse to celebrate the 52nd anniversary of
's life as an android (hey, we all know he's been dead since '52) in such a manner.
I thought about lodging some complaints against the army of confetti-throwing jacklegs that are primed to invade the world's streets and pubs this Eve. You lightweight tourists, I mock you... well, sort of. I don't begrudge anyone having a good time, whether it's for one day of the year or the 365th. New Year's always has a crazy feel to it. Its debaucherous energy seeps through the walls.. it raps at the windows.. revelrous perversions burst forth at the slightest provocation. And I'm the type of person that thrives in this raucous environment, feeding off the chaos and disorder, the madness, the passion....
But not on New Year's.
There is something unnerving about scores of individuals full of untapped, drunken energy too dubious to be messed with prowling the streets until sunrise. Though my feelings aren't any different toward people who behave this way 4 days out of 7 - myself and my friends included - December 31st simply scares the hell out of me, as wide-eyed revelers travel down intoxication's golden road. I'll keep my distance, thanks.
But for you crawlers heading out to get buttered up, here are 5 less-obvious tips:
1. That "liquor before beer" talk is bull if you add carbonation
2. Drinks at body temp makes you drunk faster. Make sure that shot of Jaeger is cold :)
3. Take a Flintstone or a Centrum... a hit of vitamins is always good for business
4. Getting on your cell and drunk-dialing people is NOT cool... especially when you're calling me!
5. Bring a towel along... you never know when you'll have to hitch a ride
Cheers all. Take care of yourselves out there and Happy New Year.
posted by Flash at 12/31/2004 08:36:00 AM
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