At Least They Have the Space Needle

Seattle is no stranger to mediocrity and unrealized expectations. They're the home of the Seahawks, the Mariners, and the Supersonics, who, until Ray Allen showed up, would wet themselves if the Jailblazers so much as breathed in their general direction. So it should be no surprise to you that in the month of May, Ichiro, Adrian Beltre, and the Seattle Mariners are 3-10 and have scored a paltry 56 runs to their opponents' 77.

Ironically, the Confucius for mind-boggling inconsistency and humiliating defeat threw out the first pitch for their game against the BoSox last Saturday. But alas, they were thwarted yet again, as the pigskin sage left his patented effect on the game ...

After a pitcher's duel through the first 3 innings, the Mariners managed to eek ahead, finding themselves with a 3-1 lead in the bottom of the 6th inning. Sadly (and almost appropriately), this lead was short-lived, as the Mariners were promptly blown out of Safeco Field - the victims of a 5-run shelling that all but ended the game.

At first I wondered if that outcome was inevitable given the curse put on the game when the first pitch was thrown... but ya know something? Maybe the Mariners should look on the bright side... Unlike some institutions graced by the futile presence of the kindest CEO on the collegiate gridiron, it took Seattle 13 games and nearly 2 weeks to be outscored by 21...