What NFL Rookie Had the Longest Holdout?
I was wondering -- in the history of the NFL, what first round pick had the longest holdout before signing his contract? Did he pan out or was he a bust? There isn't much in it for you on this... if I'm in a good mood, I might give you a cookie out of a batch that I bake for myself.
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Ever seen commercials from the Christian Children's Fund? They have an Ernest Hemingway looking oldster that hangs out in an unidentified, 3rd world hellhole with a little boy or girl that is inevitably barefoot and plagued by flies. The child stares into the camera with his or her sad, vacant eyes, all but daring you not to feel guilty while the old guy briefly explains the child's plight. A few seconds later, the man is lead through the village/leper colony/shantytown and we see other frightened, terribly depressed children that are desperately clinging to inanimate objects. Then Ernest pipes in. "Maybe you're too busy with your day to day life. But these kids don't have time to wait for when you're ready to make a commitment. 4,200 kids died last night but a lot more can be saved with the help of sponsors. Only 80 cents a day and little whomever can learn to read and get penicillin. Why not now? You'll be a better person. Heaven's in it for you... You know what I think it is? I think you just forgot the number." Then the man walks out to some railroad tracks (I guess he didn't tool up to the village in his Range Rover) and while a random train passes, we see the 1-800 number. It's the same formula every time.
About 20 minutes ago this commercial aired again. The casual yet worldly man was hanging out with a terrified little girl named something obvious like Guadalupe. The commercial seemed par for the course until Hemingway said, "and she lived in a cardboard hut on the edge of a cliff until a storm blew it away." ... [I'm gonna give you a second to absorb that - or laugh. Take your pick.] Who in the hell does the Christian Children's Fund think it's fooling? I've had enough of their trying to make me feel guilty about 80 cents a day. For all I know, the 80 cents is going to salaries of the jack-off writers that come up with storylines like this one. Living on a cliff in a cardboard hut. Maybe Lupe's grandfather should have tied it to a palm tree before he succumbed to lepresy and the other afflictions that could have been prevented if he had a sponsor. How about that, writers? The only time a child has been saved was in Garden State, where Titembay was able to parlay 80 cents a day into admission to Rutgers. Unbelievable.
*Disclaimer for idiots: I feel bad for the children. I just hate the commercial.
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Ever seen commercials from the Christian Children's Fund? They have an Ernest Hemingway looking oldster that hangs out in an unidentified, 3rd world hellhole with a little boy or girl that is inevitably barefoot and plagued by flies. The child stares into the camera with his or her sad, vacant eyes, all but daring you not to feel guilty while the old guy briefly explains the child's plight. A few seconds later, the man is lead through the village/leper colony/shantytown and we see other frightened, terribly depressed children that are desperately clinging to inanimate objects. Then Ernest pipes in. "Maybe you're too busy with your day to day life. But these kids don't have time to wait for when you're ready to make a commitment. 4,200 kids died last night but a lot more can be saved with the help of sponsors. Only 80 cents a day and little whomever can learn to read and get penicillin. Why not now? You'll be a better person. Heaven's in it for you... You know what I think it is? I think you just forgot the number." Then the man walks out to some railroad tracks (I guess he didn't tool up to the village in his Range Rover) and while a random train passes, we see the 1-800 number. It's the same formula every time.
About 20 minutes ago this commercial aired again. The casual yet worldly man was hanging out with a terrified little girl named something obvious like Guadalupe. The commercial seemed par for the course until Hemingway said, "and she lived in a cardboard hut on the edge of a cliff until a storm blew it away." ... [I'm gonna give you a second to absorb that - or laugh. Take your pick.] Who in the hell does the Christian Children's Fund think it's fooling? I've had enough of their trying to make me feel guilty about 80 cents a day. For all I know, the 80 cents is going to salaries of the jack-off writers that come up with storylines like this one. Living on a cliff in a cardboard hut. Maybe Lupe's grandfather should have tied it to a palm tree before he succumbed to lepresy and the other afflictions that could have been prevented if he had a sponsor. How about that, writers? The only time a child has been saved was in Garden State, where Titembay was able to parlay 80 cents a day into admission to Rutgers. Unbelievable.
*Disclaimer for idiots: I feel bad for the children. I just hate the commercial.
posted by Flash at 8/19/2005 05:21:00 AM
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