Nutt Sits Johnson; Will Use Untested Dick Against Cocks

Penis euphemisms threaten to overshadow the upcoming SEC tilt between Arkansas and South Carolina.

Until today, Casey Dick was your typical redshirt freshman QB but due to Robert Johnson's impotence this season, Dick will be thrust into action against Steve Spurrier's Cocks this Saturday. Johnson has struggled mightily in the pocket, leading the Razorbacks to a sorry 0-4 record in the SEC and a 2-5 mark overall. As a result, Nutt is stripping Dick's redshirt under the belief that the young man deserves a chance to show if he can spark the big O.

"He has a strong arm and good instincts," Nutt said. "It's hard to explain. He just has 'it.' He just seems to have a knack for making some plays and we're going to give him an opportunity."

Ya know.. I've met other dicks claiming to have "it." They wow me with strong arms and knacks for making plays in practice and then I insert them into the big show, only to be left disappointed and annoyed by Saturday night's end. Hopefully this Dick will prove himself to be a sturdy, reliable option. I can't imagine how hard it could actually be, as one of his targets will be Penix, a freshman flanker that registered 800 receiving yards, 12 touchdowns, 30 tackles and 350 punting yards in his senior year of high school. Reasonable success this season should prevent backup quarterbacks from other SEC schools from transferring down to Arkansas but given how much cooters always love playing with nuts and penixes, it may be just a matter of time before Jim Bob Cooter leaves the Vols scout team to seek opportunity down in Fayetteville.