Are Celebrity Lesbians Less Superficial Than the Rest of Us?

Basketball star Sheryl Swoopes, a three-time Olympic gold medalist and WNBA MVP, came out publicly as a lesbian, making her the highest-profile team sport athlete to do so while playing. Good for her. My initial reaction to this news was, "Oh really? I thought she was married and had a son." My next thought was, "I wonder what her girlfriend looks like. I bet she's hot." Yeah, I know - I'm an ignorant tart. I based my flawed logic on the belief that successful, millionaire lesbians are as big a hit with the ladies as their straight male counterparts. I mean, look at Ellen Degeneres. She's a real ladies' girl. Anne Heche, Alexandra Hedison, and now Portia deRossi (the blonde from "Arrested Development" and "Ally McBeal"). That's not a bad run at all. Were I a lesbian looking for celeb lovin, I'd put Ellen on my list of people to date - she's funny, reasonably attractive, and has millions of dollars. But I guess one person does not a sample size create, as in my reserach, I've found that life partners of celebrity lesbians all seem to look like Rosie O'Donnell. Though you might say, "Well, all the outed celebrity lesbians look like Rosie O'Donnell," I present to you Cynthia Nixon - the (arguably) hot redhead from Sex & the City. What? Are redheads your game? Thought you had a chance with the smart, down to earth S&C girl? Sorry- that chance is saved for sweater vest-wearing education activist, Christine Marinoni. Much like Clay Aiken, she's getting hotter ass than you.

So when I googled Sheryl Swoopes' better half, I wasn't sure what type of woman I'd find. ... Meet Alisa Scott. I'll be honest, if you told me this was the girlfriend of a three-time gold medalist/millionaire who Nike named a shoe after, I would have laughed in your face and then asked for a hit of your herbal delights. But I suppose I should've seen this coming. The phenomenon of celebrity lesbians finding love with fat chicks is incredibly intriguing. I've never seen this occur to any significant degree with celebrity gay men, nor have I spotted it heavily in the hetero dating world. How often do you find athletes, movie stars, and corporate sharks (be they male or female) running around with members of the opposite sex that are more revered for their, uh, personality? It's probably 1 in every 500 cases, occuring most often with guys who married their high school sweethearts before they made it to the bigtime. And once these guys "make it," the original woman is frequently kicked to the curb, replaced by a younger, hotter model. So what's the deal here? Are the rest of us simply more superficial and shallow than celebrity lesbians? Is there something I'm missing?